Official Notice:
I Am Going To Bed
At 7:30 PM
A public service announcement from your boyfriend, broadcasting live from Sacramento, California, to the love of his life.
EXCLUSIVE footage from the scene. Note the "Are you still watching?" screen — even Netflix has given up on him. Investigation of the pillows: ongoing.
⏳ TIME REMAINING UNTIL SHUTDOWN
--:--:--
Sleepiness Level97%
Frequently Asked Questions
- Q: 7:30?? Like... PM???
- A: Yes. The sun will still be out. He does not care.
- Q: Is he 87 years old?
- A: Chronologically, no. Spiritually, he is a retired man who yells at birds and eats dinner at 4:45.
- Q: Can I call him?
- A: You can call. A sleeping man will not answer. Please leave a message after the snore.
- Q: Does he love me?
- A: Enormously. Tremendously. More than anything. Just... horizontally, and with his eyes closed, starting at 7:30.
- Q: What if there's an emergency?
- A: All emergencies must be scheduled for tomorrow morning. He'll be up at like 5 AM anyway. Weirdo.